Imagine that one day you woke up, and there were no people in the world. Every thing would be exactly the same – lights would still be on, people’s belongings would still exist. It’s just that there are no human beings anywhere. How would you feel, and what would you do?

Trying to imagine such a world was extremely frightening for me. I hate the feeling of isolation – imagining myself standing in the middle of a field, forest, or desert is enough to send chills down my spine. I tried to picture myself walking down a completely empty street… imagined myself walking down Dorm Row, across campus, up to Harvard Square… I’m sure the silence would have been deafening.

The more I think about it, though, I believe the most horrifying thing wouldn’t be the lack of people. Instead, it’s the feeling of being completely by yourself, consumed by your own thoughts. Living life with no purpose because there’s no benefit to doing anything. Yes, if people weren’t around I could finally sing aloud as I skipped down Dorm Row. I could dance the day away on the stage in Kresge. I could read through every book in Barnes & Noble. I could steal as much food as I wanted from Shaw’s. I could drive forever and ever and go anywhere I wanted.

But when there’s no one around, does any of it even matter? What is the point of living, then? Why sing when no one can hear you, why dance when your dance is wasted on ghostly shadows and empty chairs? What do I gain in furthering my knowledge or going anywhere I please? I couldn’t share these experiences with anyone, and “success” would mean nothing without someone with whom to compare. In fact, in such a world, you would feel like nothing but a blip on the radar. Your existence would mean nothing – people wouldn’t remember you after you die because there are no people. No matter what you do or what you think, it doesn’t matter to anyone.

In the end, both Chao and I decided that in such a case, we would just lock ourselves away in our room, living each day and pretending as if somewhere, somehow, there were still people. I can very well imagine that – sometimes it feels that way during the night at Next House, when I’m still awake working in my room and everything is quiet. That’s how it was during summer at times. In the scenario Chao presented above, I would just literally sit in my room every day, probably typing on my computer (the Internet would still exist, it’s just that no one would answer you), reading books, crocheting, singing, dancing… it would just be like living an extremely long weekend.

But that’s a temporary feeling. How would it feel to live a year like that? A decade? Twenty years? What does life become then? It’s just a useless squandering of time. But in such a world, what else could you do with your time? What is the point of travelling the world or going off on an adventure? You gain personal insight, but

1. It would probably be extremely creepy! I would always think that something might jump out of nowhere and grab me. Think I Am Legend.
2. What is the use of gaining all these experiences if you can’t pass it on to someone? I guess you could write it down, but the thought of writing something down and never having anyone find or read it… that’s sort of scary in itself.

Anyways, after Chao and I shared these thoughts, Jason proposed another question that sent a jolt of fear through my body:

In such a case, where you’re locked up every day… how long before you considered suicide?

At the mention of that last word, I instinctively curled myself up into a ball. I hate the thought of death; suicide is not an exception. And yet, what was really disturbing was the fact that I – usually someone who is very much against suicide – could actually somewhat see the appeal of it in such a situation. I mean, you could either live day to day knowing you’re the only living human being, and no matter what you do nothing meaningful will ever come of it (not to mention the fact that it would just be creepy to walk down a street and see abandoned houses, shops, etc.) Or, on the flipside, you could just end it all and escape from the nightmare. In such a world, what is the difference between staying alive in your room, and not being alive at all? There really isn’t none, because no one is around to observe or care whether you’re alive or not.

Needless to say, it took us another hour of slightly more cheerful talking before we were all able to leave and go back to our own rooms for the night.